I speak Autism

There are a lot of things in this world I don't know how to do such as fractions, read maps, count money, give directions or speak Chinese (Cantonese or mandarin ;)
But I do know the language of Autism. For some reason I understand it. It makes more sense to me than a lot of other crooked things in this world.

I have learned that to be able to understand a  child with Autism you really must allow yourself to think like him and perceive the world from his perspective …. then everything makes absolute sense.

A young child with autism is primarily governed by two things; his needs and his senses.

Needs

ASD children are target oriented. They want someTHING rarely someONE and their entire mission is to get it. This need can either be for security or for reinforcement

Security: ASD children need to understand what is about to happen in order to feel safe. They are usually poor at understanding language at a young age so rely on routine and structure to predict what will come next (probably same as yesterday and the day before) so if the routine is changed anxiety and insecurity set in which may lead to tantrums and what a lay person might see as negative behaviors.


Reinforcement: ASD children are focused on getting their desired item ; brilliant planning and intellectual skills go into reaching a remote control, iPhone, wires, blue tack , or any item of obsession.
The first words of  ASD children are usually to ask for a reinforcer or desired item; chips, coke, ipad etc
This is known as instrumental speech.

Senses

ASD children are frequently just "playing around" with and discovering their developing senses trying to make sense of the world. So when a child is licking and mouthing everything in sight it usually means his oral motor senses are developing. If he is blocking his ears and releasing them this usually means he is playing with sounds. if you look at neon lights and close and open your eyes quickly you will see colorful patterns which an ASD child might find fun. The only difference is that you understand where they come from  and he doesn't. If you throw a ball up in the air you know it will eventually fall on the ground, because you understand the laws of gravity. The ASD child is frequently experimenting trying to make sense of all the rules we know and take for granted. Again to a lay person  this appears to be meaningless stereotypical behavior where infact it might be a learning process.

Stereotypical behaviors  also occur when a child is overwhelmed by a situation and wants to block it out. Most parents complain that the worst behaviors are displayed at doctors clinics and outings….well naturally!!!! These are places that are "out of routine" the child was probably not told in "his" language where he is going is therefore scared and anxious.  "His" language means visual aids. Use pictures, visual schedules and don't rely on verbal information even f he is repeating it after you because at times of anxiety all that is forgotten so you need to rely on the strong sense…visual .

Another rule I learned is never assume… i was once told at University that the word ASSUME comes from making as ASS out of U and ME…. and thats exactly what it does.

Dont assume that an ASD child remembers what you told him in the morning.
Dont assume that he "knows" that his is wrong (social rules)
Dont assume that he knows that if you throw a ball up in the air it ail naturally come back down (laws of physics)
Dont assume that a task is too easy or too difficult for him….try and test.
Dont assume that "like other children" he SHOULD like Barney/to be hugged/ to be invited to birthdays/ to be tickled/company of others.
Dont assume that his biggest reinforcement cannot possibly be a teabag… because it probably is.

If a child is displaying negative behavior then 9/10 times it is caused by the environment or people in it. Stop and try and see, feel and hear what he is seeing feeling and hearing and you might just figure it out.

Put simply the senses are not always functioning at a "normal" level The child maybe smelling things strongly (the way you were when you were pregnant) or not tasting things at all (same as you when you have a severe cold) or unable to feel his legs (pins and needles after you've been sitting on them)
What do you see: a child who is smelling things strongly may scream at the sight (or smell) of certain food or people…. to you its just a screaming child being spoilt. A child who can't taste things might only be eating crunchy things so he can hear them or spicy things so he can feel them …..to you he is a"picky eater". A child who is walking funny, stomping his feet  or running around barefoot on cold floors might just be trying to regain sense in them. A child who is having what seems to be a complete melt down maybe too aroused and is feeling every stitch on his shirt. Sometimes its all just too much because sensory input is too strong and the " filter" is not working properly; so the child might be seeing the neon lights flashing, focusing on the lump in your mascara, hearing the buzz of the AC as well as the fly in the room, feeling the stitches on his shirt and smelling the cheese from the kitchen all at once while you are trying to teach him ABC!!!

ASD children try to help their sensory problems themselves; they actually tell you in "autism language" what is going on with what you perceive as simply "odd" behaviors. Let them guide you. Listen to their behaviors and develop a plan based on that. A good occupational therapist will pick up on this and work from there.

So once you too can be free of social norms, laws of physics, assumption, stop relying heavily on verbal language  and understand the senses you will be able to understand why your son/daughter is doing what he/she is doing. Only then can you actually begin to help.


Learn to speak autism THEN teach them your language.